Can’t maintain an erection

Dear Pastor,

I am 61 years old and I have been reading your column for many years. You are the one who officiated at the wedding of my wife and I. My wife was living abroad and she came down and married me. I went to America and lived with her but I didn't like America. I spent 10 years there but I came back to Jamaica. My wife says that she is not coming back to live. We have three children and they are with her.

My divorce has come through but now I have another problem. I am with a woman and I would like to settle down with her. My problem is bigger than I can manage. The house that we are living in is hers. I have a house but it needs some repairs so I am working on that. The understanding I have with my lady friend is that I will continue to live here at her house and rent mine.

I feel inadequate, Pastor, because I cannot get a strong erection and this woman expects me to come on strong all the time which I cannot do. I have gone to the doctor and I received tablets. But their effect does not last for a long time. That is my main reason for writing to you. My lady friend is in her early 50s. I don't know what to do. If things don't change with me, I believe that she will either break up with me or keep another man with me. So please give me your advice.

K.

Dear K.,

I am sorry to hear that the marriage between you and your wife was not successful. So you returned to the land of your birth. I hope that the relationship that you are now having with another woman and yourself will work. I would hate to know that a man your age is unhappy.

It seems to me that you need to go to see a urologist. You said that you went to the doctor and you received tablets. Men with the type of problems that you are having need to see a specialist. I am suggesting therefore that you should ask your primary doctor to refer you to a urologist. Do so as early as you can.

Pastor